This I Know

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Course Ideas / Reflections

The last few weeks have been challenging for me, and I have felt the awkward stretching that comes sometimes when change is upon us.  There is this desire to be certain of things, to know what lies ahead, to make nothing but informed decisions, and to navigate the consequences with aplomb.  We want to understand the right way to go about things, to think about things– the proper way to perceive, and to know.

Today I walked uncertainly through a stand of trees, then moved to the chair by the window, then reached for a snack, a glass of water, a handful of something salty, walked down the driveway to get the mail, then come back to the window.  All the while I was half-built, half-open, half-shaded, half-suffering, half-teetering.  Eventually though, my gnawing disdain for things I cannot even touch began to feel like an opening.

I wonder sometimes at how few are the voices of uncertainty.  It’s not very attractive, of course, being uncertain.  We become more easily influenced when we’re unsure of ourselves, and yet when we’re too bold or insistent in the act of forging ahead, we miss what is given.  Uncertainty doesn’t sell tickets, or advertising, earn contracts, or influence people.  We avoid it at all costs– it’s not on television, but it’s in us.  It’s right there sometimes.  It’s wearing us around, jabbing us up in the air on the end of its stick.  Even a wetsuit is too far out on the periphery to shield us from what is blooming within.

But now that I’ve seen it, things are okay.

Now that I’ve seen it for what it is, I can work with it.  I can be uncertain, and go for the ride.  Rides end.

I don’t particularly want to retain a few of the things this uncertainty has revealed to me, and I can see that.  I can also see the barriers to letting them go.  In beautiful words given me by a friend, I can see that I am in a struggle with truth.  I’m not lost or off track.  I’m just right at the middle of it.  Down to the point of entanglement, mystery, and superposition.  I’m arm-wrestling with what is glorious and most natural, and hasn’t fully been birthed as of yet.  Truth and I, we want the same things, but some part of me still wants just a little bit more, a little something else.

I want the truth, and

I want to show God my earthly thesis– to come home with something beautiful, not return with a box of dust and an army-man I spray-painted once in second grade.  God doesn’t care of course.  The door is always open.  This is what I mean.  But there are so many confident people who have this figured out, and wouldn’t it make sense that if I had a clue about something– anything– I would be able to sustain that, too.  But just now, my heart has a wobble.

The Earth has a wobble.

My heart has a wobble like the Earth.  It’s a true wobble.  The beauty is in the awareness that I can trust it.

There’s something holy about these encounters with ourselves.  These are the times when the heart and the mind re-order themselves and become smeared into the world so deeply we are suddenly grasping at all three.  We need, sometimes, to be uncertain, so that the new can emerge.  And never am I more confident in the logic of my heart than when I recognize the difficulty in which I have found myself is, in fact, the quickest way through.  Confusion is the answer that grace has brought.  It is the string being pulled out of the knot.

It’s time to take a few more lines out of the resume.  I’m working back to the blank sheet of paper.  Who would I be, if I wasn’t who I’ve been?  At peace, probably.  The only way to find out is to find out.  I feel okay because I know uncertainty is like a little film of color that floats on a deep and abiding knowing.  It seems very massive, but it is more like a mirage.

I’m thirsty because I’m walking through a desert mirage and I believe what I see sometimes, but it is the thirst that will lead me to water.  This I know.

48 Comments

  1. I don’t see uncertainty as a weakness but rather a time to reflect, to look at both sides of an issue, to ponder my thoughts, feelings, beliefs and then to decisively move forward.

    Liked by 8 people

    • Thank you for your thoughts here, Wolfegeo. I would agree that uncertainty is not a weakness, though it brings with it at times the acute sensation of vulnerability and awkwardness. I think I should clarify and say that what I was describing as uncertainty was not the uncertainty of which meal to prepare, or which outfit to wear– or any of the various uncertainties we can bear without feeling the pain that comes of being uncertain of one’s own being. The latter is a more apt description of what I was feeling and exploring here. But ultimately I agree it is a time to reflect, to gather, to listen, to be informed in a new way, and then to move again from there…

      Peace
      Michael

      Liked by 2 people

  2. i’m certain
    that i don’t understand this
    or much of anything else, Michael!
    time has proven that most of my
    perceptions are semi-truths,
    or total misperceptions.
    however, i’m certain
    that i feel comfort in being
    with you & others
    in uncertainty 🙂

    Liked by 7 people

    • I share in that comfort, David! When we see and meet one another in a field of compassion and acceptance, it communicates something that pierces these temporary veils that arise. So we can help each other a great deal I think, and certainly we carry one another in ways that we may never fully understand…

      Peace
      Michael

      Liked by 2 people

  3. uncertainty, hesitation, vulnerability, confusion, all have a yucky factor, but like you are quasi famous for saying, there is a beauty and symmetry in all ways of being. Wishing you a way back to peace.

    with love, Linda

    Liked by 6 people

    • Thank you, Linda. You said it perfectly– the yucky factor! But through the muck and the yuck some new shoots always poke up to start growing, so as you remind me, there is a symmetry to our every process. Thank you for the kind thoughts, which helped… 🙂

      Peace and Love,
      Michael

      Liked by 2 people

  4. To know uncertainty is to insert knowledge into the gap and uncertainty splinters, cracks, crumbles and falls away of its own accord. All things come to an end… in the meantime things can get precarious at times… but there you go, seeing through the uncertainty. ‘The beauty is in the awareness that I can trust it.’ Going for the job interview with a blank resume…

    Liked by 7 people

    • Thanks, Tiramit! Yes, I have felt all the parts of your note here, now. The way it cracked and splintered once one bit of knowledge found its way in, and how it has left me with a deliciously blank resume today. Hope all is well…

      Peace
      Michael

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  5. You offer a beautiful perspective and way to look at uncertainty; as the best way through the desert. I fight it and find it hard to accept uncertainty. My life seems filled with too many uncertainties, and too little clarity and action. I’m willing to make peace with my uncertainty. It might make room for more clarity or at least more peace!

    Liked by 6 people

    • Hi Brad,

      We can’t do much but accept how we feel some days, but in a way I think the uncertainty is quite valuable, for it signals our arrival at the moment in which something we’ve held or decided was so (about ourselves) is not quite correct or appropriate. The uncertainty is sort of this force compelling us to choose again– to renew the vows we once made with something false, or to let a new possibility emerge… It is not an easy moment… but if we are uncertain, and we let the uncertainty tell us what it needs to tell us, we can see what needs to be done. And then it is nearly effortless…

      Wishing you peace as well, my friend,
      Michael

      Liked by 2 people

  6. “return with a box of dust and an army-man I spray-painted once in second grade” 🙂 You can come up with some lines, Michael, can be certain of that. 🙂
    In not a very small way, my small child is teaching me a thing or two about uncertainty. You know how kids go through this phase when it is especially difficult for them to choose which shirt to wear or whether to drink from blue or green cup today. I had seen one child completely paralyzed to make a decision, for it seemed no matter what, she wanted both, the green and the blue. My other child, on the other hand, says: mommy, you can just chose the cup for me, and tomorrow, I can have that other one. And then he just skips off in total certainty of happiness, off to find bugs and snails, his faith in mommy, faith in tomorrow flowing over the edges.
    This peace of yours is comforting in many ways. I had been stuck in uncertainty perhaps not for weeks or months, but years. And like you say, uncertainty is like the film covering the water. Somewhere under there, we know, even with wobbly hearts. For me, the fear is the oil that creates the film of uncertainty.

    Liked by 6 people

    • Ha! Thank you, Kristina.

      Yes, the fear is a big thing. And when we try to take charge of it, it seems to multiply sometimes. Knowing that fear is a particular type of roadblock, and that somehow we’ve had a role in its arising in our experience, we next become afraid of when we’ll next feel fearful. Not only are we afraid, we’re afraid of the fear. Uncertainty can have this hall of mirrors feeling to it for me sometimes, and what I think I’ve learned over time is that the fear is a symptom and not a thing to be dealt with directly perhaps. Trying to deal with it directly only multiplies it. But when I realize I’m fearful, or uncertain, only because I am occupying an internal position that is untenable, then by shifting the internal position it will dissolve naturally. Of course, shifting the internal position is what we don’t want to do! And I think this is why it is fearful– because we sort of know way down inside somewhere that we want, above all else, something that isn’t ours to have. And to let it go means to let go of something we have decided is very dear to us. So we sort of get stuck…

      People can tell us all they want that the internal shift will not bring the loss of anything we truly desire– truly desire– but that is the miracle we can only experience I think. We cannot be convinced of this in advance, and so we have to take or make that leap of trust…

      All good things are so very close by. Hope you pierce that film and have a nice swim in the depths of joy and abundance.

      Peace
      Michael

      Liked by 2 people

  7. ” In beautiful words given me by a friend, I can see that I am in a struggle with truth.” That resonates with me. Struggle with truth. Thanks for sharing.
    Peace,
    Karin

    Liked by 6 people

    • I’m glad, Karin. it is an interesting expression, to struggle with truth. It resonated with me, too. When we have these pieces we want to keep that are blocking the natural flow of our lives, we end up in these struggles, but what we’re struggling with is the greater flow of goodness that we simply cannot stem. It just flows through us, naturally. And we get in the way of it so often, in so many ways! Even when we go to work to clear the path, it seems to only restrict the flow even more, as if we brought in heavy equipment and now they are all tangled up in the riverbed, too!

      Then one day we say, ‘oh! I don’t really like that peninsula there, anyway! Out with you!’ But it has to be this wholehearted decision, doesn’t it!? We can’t will against ourselves as it only increases conflict. So sometimes, we just have to ride the rapids…

      Peace to you, too.
      Hope you are well.
      Michael

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Reading your words Michael I can so understand the place you are in.
    But it is ok to be there. Because that is how we reach deeper within as we pull out that trust as our logical brains throw us into turmoil as we ‘Wobble’ in our uncertainties.

    Yes the World at large at the moment is Wobbling as you say. It too is in a time of uncertainty in which our consciousness is mirroring each other’s confusion. Uncertain times~Uncertain political energy~ Uncertain weather~ Uncertain financial markets. Uncertain futures..

    But when you realise we are within the tumbling of a matrix that is within its ‘Wash cycle’ we are being thrown about and we are each being thrown up and down in our emotional energies putting us in our final ‘Spin’

    We then have to hang out for a while and then get all of our creases ironed out..
    I have been upon a similar road all year.. Health issues, and drama’s, topped off nicely with technical stuff, just to make it more frustrating..

    But then you step back and laugh.. Because you then begin to understand that all of that drama we are also mirroring from the ‘Outside’ world..
    Once I retreated and reconnected back into the space of our Earth Mother, I instantly knew, I had to let go of that which no longer served me..
    And part of that was the internal dialogue I have as I was beating myself up within this World of Communication.

    My technical issues was telling me for weeks to slow down, disconnect.. But I ignored them.. So the Universe thought to teach a greater lesson, As my PC ‘s hard drive gave up the Ghost.. Teaching me to let go more.. 🙂

    Sorry Michael, its been a while since I came by your blog.. Seems I am making up for it all in one comment..
    I will stop now
    And wish you a decisive day filled with joy and illumination.
    Blessings
    Sue ❤

    Liked by 7 people

    • Thank you, Sue.

      Please don’t feel sorry for any length of time between visits, particularly as it sounds as thought it may be the case that you are feeling called to a little retreat from this virtual scene… I appreciate your thoughts and support and hope your own turbulence settles out.

      Letting go of what no longer serves us is I think the most appropriate response to these experiences, and in that sense they are exquisite gifts as they show us where we maybe were hiding something, or propping things up. I do think the world at large is promoting these encounters with ourselves, and that in a sense it always has. That said, I know the times we are in are quite transformative ones.

      There is a tendency for the thinking/conceptual mind to take descriptions of this process, and then arrange them like an overlay on our lives, so that it seems for a while it is going quite swimmingly. Then we need these encounters to bring the heart and the whole of the system into alignment. To teach the mind it really can’t “learn” what it is to be whole in the same way that it can learn chemistry or the geography of a city.

      Thanks for sharing and responding, Sue!

      Peace
      Michael

      Liked by 2 people

      • Yes Michael the times we are in are certainly Transformative… And each obstacle is another teaching lesson.. many thaks for that indepth response my friend..
        Wishing you a Peaceful Weekend.
        Sue

        Liked by 1 person

    • Thank you, Val! I agree completely that when faced with these wobbles we must accept the experience before us rather than fight it, and this does lead to peace. And I think it is true that things are always changing, so if that is what you mean by the truth is the wobbling then I think I understand and agree with you. That said, I also think there is something unchanging at the heart of the wobble, and that for me, it is in recognizing I’m doing nothing but wobbling that is a clue I’ve left something out of the picture that is necessary. To your point, in accepting the wobble, we place our feet back on that ground I think. Almost naturally and without effort…

      Peace
      Michael

      Liked by 1 person

      • “Something unchanging at the heart of the wobble” … Is this not Source which is undefinable but a part of everything?
        I am no scholar Michael, but I do know that I cannot understand what is not known, yet I can feel it’s existence.

        Liked by 2 people

        • Yes, Val, I think it is! We will never find the universal word for it, but that is what I was talking about. I was trying to note the distinction between the wobble, and the stillness that makes the wobbles possible. Also to note that when I am most comfortable in my own being, there is an active acknowledgment, or awareness, of them both. When the wobble is kicking up dirt in my face, and I am afraid of something, it is usually because I have lost contact with the stillness inside of the wobble.

          In what is not a very good analogy– but it did spring to mind!– it makes me think of a gyroscope. Right at the moment when its invisible axis is lost, because it has slowed down so much, suddenly instead of precessing quite nicely around the room, it starts flying around all over the place. The idea being that the well-behaved gyroscope has that invisible “something else” at work, somewhat difficult to understand, yet present and active, inseparable though it may be from the obviously spinning disc…

          Michael

          Liked by 2 people

  9. I read this over my coffee and before my walk, gave me time to ponder such beautiful truth, I’ve always like to say “I know nothing, there for I know everything”. I like to think it’s all a part of the big maze of the mind and this life that we’ve chosen. To live vicariously without a care is hard when the little voices in the back ground say No, don’t do that…but what happens when we do? We forget about the voices until the next time, perhaps after awhile we just forge ahead in utter joy regardless, as long as what we do and say are in kindness. I like to think at the end, before we do it all over again if we choose, we learn so much from these moments of indecisiveness, and in doing so, like the grinch, our hearts become larger and our minds more open to the possibility of everything which is anything, and the love slips through the portal and lights the world with the reflection of a million stars above, and more stand below feeling small, wondering the what if’s all over again. It’s a big circle of good. Peace and love, and crazy thoughts gone wild. Kim ❤

    Liked by 5 people

    • I loved your reply, Kim. It was itself one big circle of good. There is definitely a maze aspect to the mind I have felt, and a compass aspect to the heart, so it’s best when they cooperate… ❤

      I do think these experiences bring us closer to living freely, in a way that is itself a circle of goodness. When we try to live freely while we are still clinging to particular falsehoods, it can get us into jams. Even "trying" to live freely is sort of a jam. But when we are freed of our concepts, we do this effortlessly. Your words and your shares I find to be quite beautiful examples of this, my friend.

      Peace and Love
      Michael

      Liked by 1 person

  10. Walking My Path: Mindful Wanderings in Nature says

    Hey Michael,
    “This I know” is a phrase I use a lot. I always have. There are just some things of which we are absolutely certain. There is so much wisdom in this post, Michael. This I know. 🙂
    There are so many times you say what is in my heart with words I can never seem to find. I use your images and phrases in my life often. From your blog, from your poetry book. Why, just this past week I used “dig deeper.” I spent the week with a person with different beliefs with which I am usually uncomfortable. We kept digging deeper when we came across the field stone or the chest.The certainty was Love, and we both knew that.

    “But now that I’ve seen it, things are okay.” That is a great line. When we see it, we can work with it. It’s like even when things don’t feel good, they are beautiful. Even when I hate life, I love it. As soon as I can pull the string out of the knot, and celebrate the strengthening of my faith, the stretching of my heart that grace gives in times of deep process and learning, I am certain. I feel peace.

    Haha, I know what you mean about wanting to show God your earthly thesis. I often think to myself when someone doesn’t give me the benefit of the doubt, that God knows. God knows my thesis or painted bird. So there!

    “There’s something holy about these encounters with ourselves. ” I so agree! And then the lines, “We need, sometimes, to be uncertain, so that the new can emerge. And never am I more confident in the logic of my heart than when I recognize the difficulty in which I have found myself is, in fact, the quickest way through.”

    It’s true. The Earth has a wobble, and I think we are all wobbling a bit with it. It is a difficult time for so many reasons, yet unbelievably perfect as well.

    “I feel okay because I know uncertainty is like a little film of color that floats on a deep and abiding knowing. It seems very massive, but it is more like a mirage.” This is an image I will take with me like the “digging deeper” from a previous post of yours. They stick with me and give me words for my knowing. I often use the analogy of a mirror. Mirage and mirror seem related in an interesting way to me.

    And this last one, “I’m thirsty because I’m walking through a desert mirage and I believe what I see sometimes, but it is the thirst that will lead me to water. ” What a spectacular line!!! It gives me goose bumps, and I shake my head at the wonder of your heart, wisdom and perfect words all rolled into this.

    Love and Grace,
    Mary

    Liked by 4 people

    • Hello Mary,

      I love your comments, just so you know. 🙂 You have a beautiful heart and share so much wisdom with us.

      When the words resonate, I think it’s because they revealed an underlying connection that was already there. Truly, we all share One Heart, and while we may be inclined to keep this little tidbit under wraps most of the time, it is a truth that peeks out here and there. Our friendship is one of those places for me.

      Yes, the moment of seeing it is the decisive one, because then it is obvious once again how to respond. We don’t even need to think about how to respond, which we may have been doing a whole of previously. The response is just there. That’s a mode shift within us, the journey from “egoic” consciousness to “universal” consciousness. It’s just who we are. It fills all of space. It begs no particular question. And the moment comes alive…

      Hope you are having a lovely weekend!
      Peace
      Michael

      Liked by 1 person

  11. “We need, sometimes, to be uncertain, so that the new can emerge.” Absolutely, and that’s why doubt is an indispensable part of any true and effective faith, do you not think, Michael? The mind believes there is some truth it can behold as an object within itself, meaning an idea in the mind, so clings to objects that it thinks are close to this imagined truth. Put simplistically, as I must, it’s stuck within a paradigm of it as subject apprehending (perceiving) truth as object, so it ties itself to falsehood from the outset. What concept, or what percept, could ever be truth itself?

    Liked by 3 people

    • Hariod, my friend, we are in complete agreement on the mechanics you’ve outlined here.

      I am going to try to make an analogy of uncertainty and doubt to Viktor Schauberger’s description of the role that turbulence plays in flowing water. He wrote that turbulence was the water’s natural effort to slow down, to reduce damage to the landscape by “breaking” its fall down the mountain and across the land. So in a sense it is a good thing. A necessary thing. But he also felt that in a well-formed stream or river system, the natural undulations of the water across the landscape could accomplish this without the straight line chaos (that humans see as the more efficient means of conveying water), and that the rolling and spiraling of the water around the bends cohered positive energy into the water and released it again tangentially into the land.

      So this mental uncertainty I find to be like a break on “illusion”, or subject-object rigidity. It stirs our awareness of this issue to the fore. But in a well-tended mind, we can perhaps accommodate our thinking, feeling and knowing much like the healthy river– rolling through the bends in a way that involves both giving and receiving in a way of mutual benefit with our surroundings. And in this “mode” of being, I do not see that doubt would play a very healthy or necessary role… In fact, at some point it may prevent us from experiencing what is really happening. It is as if we need the doubt to let us know we’re clinging to something, and then once we stop, we no longer need the doubt. Perhaps we no longer need the faith either. As we are then in the experience of being whole, and of wholeness being… which returns perfect knowledge of itself.

      Peace
      Michael

      Liked by 2 people

      • I see what you mean, Michael, and think there perhaps is a distinction to be made between doubt as an honest and passive unknowing – the reasonable declaration to oneself that one cannot be certain of the nature of one’s intended goal of and as itself – and doubt as an active scepticism. In the latter case, then I agree that this cannot play a healthy role in coming to any greater understanding.

        In orthodox Buddhist doctrine, doubt is only ever eliminated on attainment of the first of four stages of Arahantship (the end of The Path), and this first attainment, known as The Path of Stream-Entry [Pali: Sotapatti-Magga] arrives with the initial glimpsing of Nibbana. Only with that, does one know that Nibbana is, and the unknowing of it (doubt) dissolves forever.

        Just to return to my opening comment, then the eradication of doubt is the moment at which awareness releases itself from a dichotomy of the subject-object paradigm. This is to express the matter rather dryly and prosaically, but I think it fair enough to do so. Faith remains, and is strengthened, as one knows the release from self-induced suffering is possible, and that Nibbana is. [For ‘Nibbana’, substitute one’s chosen name of preference.]

        Liked by 2 people

        • I am right there with you, H. Once the self who exists in a state of conflict (the subject-object paradigm) is dissolved and replaced with a direct knowledge of what is (Nibbana), then I think doubt of the type I was trying to indicate I experienced– at least insomuch as it was once the natural manifestation of a misplaced identification– has nothing to be doubtful about. And thus is moot.

          Until it is time for the next eye exam.

          Peace
          Michael

          Liked by 2 people

  12. Maybe it’s contagious. I have felt nothing but uncertainty over the past few weeks after a bad fall wounded me, making every step an uncertainty. But you put one foot in front of the other and go on, acutely aware that any moment could be your or your loved one’s last. I have lost the oblivion of the lies we tell ourselves, making plan for tonight, tomorrow, two weeks from now…
    Very pertinent post, Michael. Sorry you are having a hard time. Ellen

    Liked by 2 people

    • Hello Ellen,

      Well I hope it’s not contagious, Ellen! Though I do think it can be when we look to one another for support, and find others who are anxious or confused as well. But you do exactly as you say. I do feel much better now and felt the release of particular modes of perceiving– patterns, goals, ambitions, whatever we wish to call them– that were at the root of this experience. I’m sounding like a broken record now, but I do find this sort of inner uncertainty, painful though it may be, to be a profound mechanism for helping us identify and dis-identify with particular obstacles to unity. I wish you peace as well, and am thinking of you in my heart, my friend.

      It is amazing how one accident really heightens our trepidation and sense of vulnerability, and it can be a bit like Humpty Dumpty trying to put that effortless confidence back together again… Love is always what remains, though. We are all caught in its perfect and grace-filled net, whether we are able to know it in the present moment or not…

      Peace and Love
      Michael

      Liked by 2 people

  13. “When nothing is certain, anything is possible.” I am uncertain where I read this, but it gave me comfort when the rug was pulled out from under me like an earthquake. Another thing that gave me comfort during that time of great uncertainty was to clarify the constants in my life that had always been there for me. Best wishes to you, Michael. I know you’ll be okay.

    Liked by 2 people

    • Hi JoAnna,

      Yes, all is well. Thank you. Sometimes for whatever reason it helps to explore things through writing. Do you feel the same sometimes? By the end, somehow the writing makes room for a deeper understanding to emerge. I do like the quote and I think it is true in many ways, particularly as we are in the process of loosening the bounds of particular perceptions and forms of identification that once held us and stymied our growth. I think the anything possible becomes the simplicity of us— the new that comes from being free and clear expressions of the Love given us, passing through to the world… It is so simple I am often confused. Ha!

      Peace
      Micahel

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  14. All I can say is that I understand! I send you the warmest regards with light filtering into the spaces that are still unclear. I think it is a time of great movement and where there is fast aggressive movement there is bound to be some uncertainty. The other thing I would like to say is that I don’t think I know anyone more qualified to get you out of your uncomfortable place, than YOU. I have an absolute knowing that the understanding you desire is on its way and that this revelation will be quite important for the next steps you take. Much love to you, Michael ❤

    Liked by 3 people

    • Thank you, Lorrie. We are all equally qualified, I might suggest, to rest on the nature of our own being, but it does often seem more complicated than that. Things are good, as they have always been despite my occasional forays into the contrary opinion. Never works, that route. Your confidence and trust in me is a blessing, Lorrie, which I return to you multiplied my friend.

      Peace
      Michael

      Liked by 1 person

  15. Genie says

    Sometimes, uncertainty is a form of openness, where one is not attached to the linear mind and having to disect things, nor identify with any thing or concept in particular; as well: “It’s what you know — after you know everything, that really counts.”

    Liked by 2 people

    • Thank you, Genie. I can sense how uncertainty is a type of openness. It seems to require a certain willingness to let the sands shift beneath us to discover new territory, and I find this experience is sort of like composting our histories… they fertilize new life… Once you know everything, hopefully you follow it quickly by realizing you know nothing at all!

      Peace
      Michael

      Liked by 2 people

  16. Pingback: Curves Around Here and There | Walking my path: Mindful wanderings in nature

  17. Hi Michael,

    “The last few weeks have been challenging for me, and I have felt the awkward stretching that comes sometimes when change is upon us.” Yes, I too, have been having such a mutable time, with some rough patches, but still a lot of love. Such a pleasure to read your words here as they are reassuring. Especially this, “I’m thirsty because I’m walking through a desert mirage and I believe what I see sometimes, but it is the thirst that will lead me to water. This I know.” I think I know it, too, for now 🙂

    That even the mirage is just an illusion that shows us, we can be quenched.

    There have been fires blazing here, and I offer up my tears to those who have lost their homes, and I remember that I already “showed God my earthly thesis” and he gave me an F. But, he was kind enough to show me, look to the heavens inside me, and look all around. Look beyond the thesis and see all your other ‘A’s. We got this 🙂

    Your writing here, and your knowing, and the coincidence of similar themes, proves to me all the time how united we are. Thank you for your voice.

    Peace, Ka

    Liked by 1 person

  18. LaVagabonde says

    I appreciate the vulnerability in your words, Michael. I believe that when we let go and submit to uncertainty, things become clear. It sometimes takes a while, but letting go helps move the process along. Everyone is different, though, so I know you’ll find your own unique way out of the storm.

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