A film lies over the world, a distortive coating– a difficulty that has been sprinkled throughout the realm. Somehow we let the powder escape from the bag: the dust that causes permanence to fracture and dissemble into half-lives, the dust that causes recognition to thicken and cloud into obscurity. The wind blew it in all directions. Now everything is a strange, skewed cinema of what it once was. Now fading has become natural, and youth […]
The last half of this year, and the last two months in particular, have reduced the aperture of my life down to such a tight radius that I feel as though I’ve been scanning the field of experience and possibility one dim pixel at a time. There’s not much plot to derive from such a view– not much context or depth with which to work. Day and night are shades of brightness, but little more. […]
Sometimes Life is like you’re standing on a crowded street, oblivious to everything but a chunk of gristle encrusted steak of an idea of who you should be being that you’re politely chewing for years on end– years and years and years, utterly distracted, like it’s an antidote, like you’re a cat encumbered by a wad of something gooey and medicinal the vet jammed deep in your cheek just out of reach of the jawbone’s […]
A mind enamored of its own disguise cannot see all the imminent Buddhas– the ones stationed everywhere it looks. The Ones everywhere it can’t quite see. (Stop here for a moment and take a look around.) (Do you see?) A mind convinced of its own fabrications cannot imagine that experience itself is an omni-sided doorway– a passage to every form of grace. A passage to every glory, seated in circles. (Don’t worry where, just imagine… that you […]
A lawn bordered by backlit trees, and a sun pouring forth on the matters of this age. Such consistency in the face of my impromptu madness. The smattering of robins working through the yard understand exactly what the sun is saying. Their curious heads turn in silent clicks from one world to the next. Some have scruffy necks and perform shutter-speed calculations. They all have Open, upturned eyes. Open. I’m catching on. The quality of […]
Sometimes when the door slams and the house wobbles, we forget the stew bubbling happily on the stove. We forget the scent of roasting carrots. We forget the light dancing softly on the candle. Sometimes when the light turns red and two horns joust in reply, we forget the fresh cut flowers on the passenger seat. We forget we were celebrating an abiding love. We forget the other reasons for this plane are moot. Sometimes […]
When asked to explain the self, the Buddha demurred. How would this help? Likewise, a trusted computer will not look too closely at division by zero, not because it is impossible, but because of the hypnotic ramifications. Caught in its beguiling web, the self resists clear understanding. Better to consider the photon. When a filament of refined metallic earth is filled to the brimming point with a humming sweetness, or space itself collapses into an incredible, […]
What if we look into the night sky, but can’t understand what it says? This happens all the time, because we sent Meaning away once. All of us. Banished it from our minds. Cut ourselves right in two like cosmic butchers. Each from each. Then each from each again. For our own good, we said. Looked up at the stars. Lost count. Lost our way. Every half blamed the other. We’ve got the right half, we […]
Calculus reveals itself to be the study of my fears. The tangent to a curve is a line, a rock slung into the void of space, a cannonball flight untempered by gravity, a prognosis insulated from relationship and possibility. If we take the vector properties of this miniscule instant, extrapolate them, and play the tape, well… uh oh. When the Studebaker is whipping around a turn, an antique rocking chair strapped inadequately to the roof, once […]
I was sitting on the squishy bottom of a short stack of water about three feet tall, beneath a full sun, fully clothed, buttons made up, with little bubbles hiding out in my eyelashes, watching a fish watch me back through the grass, thinking about the strange economies of tadpoles and turtles, wondering what that brewing pain was inside of my chest, as I was somehow temporarily without my memory of the direct effects of […]
Embracing Forever 